Nikki Giovanni calls the Poetry Crisis Line

COUNSELOR:  Poetry Crisis Line, what is your emergency?

CALLER: While it is true


CALLER: (though only in a factual sense)

COUNSELOR: Facts are a good place to start. What are we discussing?

CALLER: That in the wake of a / Her-I-can

COUNSELOR: Is that where a Yes-we-can meets an I’m-with-her?

CALLER: comes a / Shower

COUNSELOR: Wishful thinking, I guess. Are you talking about a rain shower? Or a shower in your bathroom?

CALLER: Surely I am not

COUNSELOR: A baby shower?

CALLER: The gravitating force

COUNSELOR: Uh… a meteor shower?

CALLER: that keeps this house

COUNSELOR: Wait–your house was hit by a meteor?

CALLER: full of panthers

COUNSELOR: Uh… That’s a first. Did they call ahead?


COUNSELOR: If they do, don’t anther.

CALLER: LBJ has made it

COUNSELOR: Do you mean the dead president? Or the LBJ Space Center?

CALLER: quite clear to me

COUNSELOR: If you say so. Do you think NASA makes a practice of packing wild animals into space rocks?

CALLER: He doesn’t give a / Good goddamn what I think

COUNSELOR: I do. Care what you think, I mean. I don’t stuff big cats into meteors.

CALLER: (else why would he continue to masterbate in public?)

COUNSELOR:  I don’t know. Poor impulse control?


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