R. Buckminster Fuller calls the Architecture Crisis Line

Happy 126th birthday to R. Buckminster Fuller!

TED (counselor): Architecture Crisis Line, what is your emergency?
R. BUCKMINSTER FULLER (caller): Everything you’ve learned in school as “obvious” becomes less and less obvious as you begin to study the universe.
TED: Maybe that could inspire you to come up with new ideas.
FULLER: For example, there are no solids in the universe.
TED: That would make it hard to do construction. 
FULLER: There’s not even a suggestion of a solid.
TED: Is there a suggestion box? Maybe you can write one in.
FULLER: There are no absolute continuums.
TED: Are there pens?
FULLER: There are no surfaces.
TED: Right. Maybe you can put the suggestion card on your knee to fill it out?
FULLER: There are no straight lines.
TED: Don’t be embarrassed about your handwriting. I’m sure somebody will be able to read it.

Flanders Fields a Call (John McCrae calls the Poetry Crisis Line)

To everyone who has lost a loved one to war, the Poetry Crisis Line grieves with you this Memorial Day, and wishes you solace.

NED (counselor): Heidily doodely, this is the Poetry Crisis Line. What is your problemirino?
JOHN MCCRAE (caller): In Flanders Fields the poppies blow
NED: Isn’t it dandelions you blow on?
MCCRAE: Between the crosses
NED: Well, I’ll bite. What do you get when you cross a poppy with a dandelion?
MCCRAE: Row on row.
NED: Who, nelly. Roe is from fish. Flowers have seeds. Let’s not go mixing up the natural order of things.